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53 funny divorce quotes to ease the pain of separation
May all you ever wished for come to you. I realized I was clutching my purse in a death grip.
For sale! It was a mixed marriage. You can learn something from every experience.
I'm only upset I'm not a widow. Because they're worth it.
Ambrose Bierce In our family, we don't divorce our men, we bury them. It's got to hee weird when a divorce lawyer is fighting for your kids to get custody of you.
That's what happens when you haven't been home in eighteen years. Rich Vos My husband and I have never considered divorce. Paul Coleridge Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass. Yeah, the divorce usually takes place after men point out that women gained more weight after marriage.
Funny divorce quotes
Bette Davis A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there's less of you. A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and have the patient sit up on the table. What funy divorce quotes should I add to this list?
Satan was busy? Murder, yes, but divorce, never.
I am wanting private sex
Gerald F. But that has happened zero times.
If two people were married and they just had a great thing and then they got divorced, that quoyes be really sad. Divorce is a piece of paper.
Funny divorce quotes to help you move on with ease
Nobody ever died of divorce. You should be prepared for anything in divorce proceedings … even the truth. I'm divkrce, he's Klingon. They stay together through anger and hatred and festering misery, just like God intended. Lee Trevino She cried and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook. Elinor Glyn Search About Wise Old Sayings is a database of thousands of inspirational, humorous, and thoughtful quotes, sorted by category for your enjoyment Featured.
Handelsman Margaret Atwood The happiest time of anyone's life is just after the first vunny.
17 funny divorce sayings to make you put on a happy face
I hope these funny divorce quotes will ease your pain during this journey. Resources Funny Divorce Sayings and Quotes Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old funny divorce quotes, funny divorce sayings, and funny divorce proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources. Let me dviorce you, after five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out.
Carol Leifer I'm not upset about my divorce. Lieberman 2. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved of her.
Funny divorce sayings and quotes
Zsa Zsa Gabor My mother always said don't marry for money, jer for money. Then there will be at least one man to regret my death. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
Love is grand … Divorce is a hundred grand. Jack Benny You know why divorces are so expensive?
The same can be said about marriage. Yet, because divorce is so serious, finding a way to laugh a little can help relieve the tension.
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Dave Barry In Palm Springs, they think homelessness is caused by bad divorce lawyers. I was traded. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left. Failure is staying married to a person you no longer love. Arguing with a lawyer is like wrestling with a pig in mud.
Jean Kerr Divorce, a bugle blast that separates the combatants and makes them fight at long vunny. He wants a no-fault divorce, whereas I would prefer to have the bastard crucified.